“Law & Order: Criminal Intent”
Tuesday 9pm, NBC
When the whole Anna Nicole thing happened a couple months back I thought, Someday this is going to make an outstanding episode of “Law & Order.” People, that day has come. Original Buffy/celebrity figure skater/homewrecker Kristy Swanson plays a thinly veiled version of America’s white trash princess as she gives birth to one child, mourns the death of another and then dies herself. The producers apparently embraced the inherent absurdity of the situation and hired “Arrested Development”’s David Cross for the Howard K. Stern lawyer role. Note that this is a Mike Logan (Chris Noth) episode, so if you were looking forward to another of Vincent D’Onofrio’s masterfully tic-laden performances, think again.
“Grey’s Anatomy”
Thursday 9pm, ABC
The third season of the popular medical sudser winds down, and it can’t end soon enough. This show went off the rails around mid-season, specifically in the three-part ferry crash arc that featured title character Meredith actually dying for, like, five hours, but then coming back and being totally fine. No physical, mental or emotional damage. This from a show in which characters spend seasons moping about what co-workers they are or are not sleeping with. Add in the increasingly tiresome Cristina/Burke relationship, the utterly nonsensical pairing of Izzie and George and the otherwise irrelevant supporting characters and you have a huge mess. Unless things improve dramatically in these last few episodes (and they could—last year’s season finale was insanely good) viewers should consider jumping ship along with Addison, who’s on the way to her own spin-off.
“Traveler”
Thursday 10pm, ABC
The idea behind this action-drama is a good one, but the marketing has been atrocious. A trio of friends is set to graduate from college and they all pull one last prank. The end of the stunt puts two of them in front of a public building, and the third one calls to tell them he’s sorry just as the building goes boom. The other two — caught by numerous video cameras — are immediately branded as the perps. Now they’re on the run, hiding from the Feds and trying to track down their mysterious “friend,” Will Traveler, who is the only one who can clear their names. Like I said: interesting. But also: very complicated. And setting the promos to Augustana’s “Boston” just confuses me more. This is why you can’t launch a new show, ABC!
