“When guns are outlawed, only outlaws will have guns” may be a bumper sticker-ready bit of NRA rhetoric, but there is a certain logic to it: If the law prohibits gun ownership, only people who disregard the law (presumably some nasty characters) will own guns. Thing is, in Virginia at least, this is all just hypothetical, because good God, everything’s legal. If you’ve got your papers straight, you can own virtually any weapon you can imagine. So before we began our hunt for the weapons black market around here, we had to find out who it catered to. We had to find out who can’t own guns and which guns they can’t own.
According to the Code of Virginia, the only weapons that are unequivocally, outright, no-quitsies illegal to own are “streetsweeper” semi-automatic shotguns and then a whole arsenal from somebody’s film noir nightmare: Teflon-coated bullets, blackjacks, brass knuckles, throwing stars, switchblades and throwing knives. And that’s it. You want an AK-47? Get a conceal-and-carry permit and you’re set.
O.K., so it’s not quite that terrifyingly easy. Here are the caveats on the books: convicted felons, fugitives, illegal immigrants, dishonorably discharged former military personnel, people with restraining orders against them, drug addicts and the mentally handicapped are all ineligible to apply for concealed weapons permits. Of that group, all but the dishonorably discharged and the restrained-against are restricted from owning weapons at all.
Meanwhile, anyone looking to buy a gun from a licensed dealer has to undergo an extensive background check unless he or she is a police officer, prison guard, licensed private security guard or someone buying an antique gun. Except there’s that gun show loophole: When guns are purchased from private individuals (as opposed to licensed dealers) at gun shows, no background check is necessary. Still, there are certain weapons you’ll have a hard time legally owning no matter how you purchase them.
Virginia law says you can own just about any weapon, though demonstrating any aggressive intent with certain guns (which includes just firing the things) can get you in big trouble. Automatic weapons and sawed-off shotguns or rifles can only be owned as curiosities or for scientific purposes. Pulling the trigger on one can get you convicted of any one of a number of felonies, depending on the context. However, even owning these things as curiosities is a pretty difficult legal claim to make, as they’re covered under the National Firearms Act of June 26, 1934. That law lays out a complex process for the licensed ownership of automatic weapons, sawed-off shotguns and rifles, silencers and explosives. And the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms doesn’t give a license to own a bazooka to just anyone. Evidently, it’s extremely difficult for a private citizen to justify his application for automatic weapons to the ATF, and on the extremely slim chance an application gets through, a proud new grenade owner still has to pay hefty transport taxes for the privilege.
So to recap, streetsweeper shotguns and street brawl aids are illegal; felons can’t own guns; and machine guns and their ilk are difficult but not impossible to own legally. Everything else is kosher. Scary stuff to be sure, but it pales in comparison to the hidden danger lurking in every pet store in the state. Thankfully, Section 18.2-313 of the Virginia weapons code makes it illegal to “use any poisonous or dangerous snake or reptile in such a manner as to endanger the life or health of any person.” We can only imagine the lawless, reptilian frontier that Virginia must have been before that particular decree was handed down.
